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What Matters

Everywhere I look I see how wrong it is to have the body I have, and to treat it the way I do.



Apparently, no, not 'apparently', but very clearly, I'm supposed to change the color and texture of my hair regularly, put paint and stuff on my eye lids, eye brows, cheeks, and lips. I'm supposed to stain my teeth and put holes in my ears. I'm supposed to change the odor of my body by putting stuff under my armpits, and into my vagina and then something else on my neck for an extra scent. I'm supposed to take away the hair from under my arm pits and on my legs and maybe even between my legs. I'm supposed to color/paint my nails on my hands and feet. Then, when all that is done I'm supposed to wear clothes that show a lot of my breasts and that make it hard to for my lungs to take in enough air, and I'm supposed to put shoes on my feet that damage my entire spine, hips, knees, ankles and toes.


Then I'm supposed to go into work and focus on work?! And I'm supposed to believe a man loves me for who I am when clearly the me that is standing there isn't even me.


Well, I've never felt good about my body. I've been ashamed of my legs for decades. My friends and strangers look at my legs and then quickly look away.  My legs are bigger than the rest of my body, they're not misshaped, they're just big. But of course, even if they were misshaped, why should anyone care?


Having a sex life isn't the easiest when we're ashamed of our bodies. Playing sports, going swimming, even sitting at a table is difficult when we're thinking down deep "I'm so embarrassing".


Finally, I came onto the internet and bookmarked dozens of sites that show photos or tell stories of women with real bodies... and this has made all the difference for me. I look at these sites every day. I saturate my brain with information from these sites every day. And now I'm starting to believe that not only do women's bodies truly come in all shapes but it really doesn't matter whatsoever what any body looks like at all.  My body is healthy, strong, agile, and fit in its own way.  And that is what really matters about my body.


What's truly important, other than my health, is who I am, what I do, how I behave, feel and think. That's what matters!


I now eat what I want, and I eat good foods. I now exercise and focus on my health, without the negative vibrations of "change how you look" over my head. I now get to enjoy my days!


I realize that our society is sick and I don't want to be a part of it, in this regard, at all. I love the saying that I got from one of the sites: Never underestimate the huge  middle finger you are giving to the world when you make peace with your body.  I love that because my accepting my body is one of the most independent and strong things a woman can do in this society of ours.  I love that I'm saying "magazines, friends, tv shows, ads, none of you are going to rule my life. You're all nuts! And women who see me in my shorts, and see me smiling and healthy and playing sports, you can all get a taste of what your lives truly can be. I love that.


Thank you for this site. What a great idea it is. How transformational it is for so many of us.

Thank you.

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